Innocence

You should use money and save people,
Instead of saving money and using people.

Heard this quote from my sister... she said pastor prince said this in one of his sermons... I find it quite amazing...

I have been pondering the meaning of innocence for a particularly long time and these are some definitions that I came up with:

• Believing that everyone who is nice to you is your friend
• Believing that your friends will never abandon you
• Believing that in order to secure a BGR you must convince the other party that you love him and only him (this is absolute stupidity)
• Believing that as long as you do nothing wrong, no harm can come on to you
• Believing that you are alive, safe and sound because of your own doing.. and that God has no credit in it
• Believing that other people think like you

I have got to be extremely careful with this blog entry... It is dangerous.. There is always this fine line between knowing a truth and believing in it.. I can say all this but when it comes to real life.. I still choose to delude myself that other people are not just using me but are genuinely interested in a friendship.. I still choose to delude myself that loyalty is the best key to unlock a good relationship.. Perhaps.. I am trying to force innocence on myself? No.. I am just trying to give God's people a chance.. trying to give myself a chance to experience a real good relationship..

That apart.. I realise that I am not very young anymore.. and I do feel the weight of my countless failed friendships (best friend to enemy) on me... I am no longer so hopeful and so energetic when it comes to forging new relationships.. I feel tired.. At some point of time I hear myself thinking that what if I don't become good friends with so-and-so.. keep it clean.. perhaps we can last as friends abit longer... perhaps I can delay the INEVITABLE decay of our friendship..

______________________________________________

With all that said, I feel that God does not want me.. or any of us.. to carry the weight of the past.. of our past bad experiences on our shoulders... He wants us to wake up each morning with a fresh understanding of his overflowing grace and love... and by that to renew us of our hope each morning as well as to wash away all the stains of our previous failures...

May the grace of God reach all of you reading this entry today.. and everyday.. may you wake up every morning with a renewed confident expectation of good from God.. Have a good opinion of God.. know that he did not withold even his most precious son to save you... how much more would he give you anything else you need...